To invinity and beyond!

Ehm, hey there! I am sure you are all wondering where I have been and what caused the loonnnggg silence on my blog. Well get yourself a cup of coffee or tea, because this is going to be another looonnngg post.

As I wrote in my previous post, I wasn’t really doing all that great. At the time my CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome) was kicking my but, which caused me to try the anti-inflammatory diet.

After two weeks of the diet, I decided to drastically adjust it. My body was not responding well to the no-gluten side of it. So rather than going gluten-free, I decided to reduce the amount of gluten I ate, but still allow myself to eat the occasional sandwich if my body indicated it needed it. Same for diary and meat products. I have been eating less meat (firmly sticking to lean meats such as chicken) and more fish and have tried to eat 1-2 vegetarian dishes each day. I occasinally eat a slice of cheese or coffee creamer, but oterwise firmly stick to non-dairy products such as almond milk.

tired2Unfortunately, the diet has still left me struggling with fatigue big time. I have had a number of weeks when going to work three days a week was pretty much all I could manage. I actually had to drop everything else, because I was physically incapable of doing it or because I was so tired that the thought of it simply stressed me out.

As such, I had to give up yoga, decorative planning and blogging for a while. I even had to skip a couple of my tap dance classes… Now that’s not to say I have not done anything fun at all though. I have allowed myself to go to Movie Park Germany and gone out to dinner with my aunt and uncle who I had not seen in a long while. So all has not been pure missery :). But I have had to pay a price for those outings: I have needed at least a day if not more to recover from them.

As a result of the fatigue I have not been making much progress with my dissertation either. Most days I have just been too tired, so my brain has been unable to translate my ideas into coherent, gramatically correct English sentences >.>.

So what has all of this meant for my weight? Well, I have to confess that it has caused me to fall of the wagon. When I feel this extremely tired my eating tends to get a bit out of control. My will power goes down the drain and I just eat anything I can get my hands on. It’s like my body goes into survival mode. Food means energy, and energy is what we need. So eating it is! The result: I put on 1,5 kilo’s… Go me *sigh*.

everytime-ithinkihave-allmy-ducks-in-a-row-one-of-the-23692428Last Saturday I decided it was time to get my ducks back in a row. I did some Yoga, planned the upcoming week and was frankly ready to get back on track… And then I got hit by some kind of virus or bacteria. Which has resulted in me leaving work early on Monday and just sitting on the couch with a body that was just a trembling heap of missery for the rest of the week. My legs felt shaky and I got out of breath just walking from the couch to the kitchen and back: and that’s 30 freaking steps (I have counted them)…

But I refuse to let this get me down. I am going to use the weekend to get better and then slowly pick-up the pieces the coming week. My goal is to get back on track with my food intake and to do what I can without over excerting myself.

Needless to say I have had to give up running for a while as well. And as much as I hate it (I actually mis running) it doesn’t look like I will be getting back into that for at least another month. I have also figured out that it is probably going to take me much longer to train for a 5k than a healthy person. So with that in mind, it is probably a good thing that my best friend and I have decided to postpone our goal to run the RunDisney race by another year.

However, this decision to postpone our first 5k wasn’t made because of my fatigue though. On the contrary, I decided to do so, because of something really, really exciting!

Are you guys ready for it?


I have booked a trip to Walt Disney World Florida!

I am so excited. My fiancé and I are going to go next year at the end of November. Yep, so we will be there during the Christmas season! This trip will be to celebrate the completion of my PhD (so I’d better finish the bloody thing!). And I am so, so, so excited!

My mother-in-law is also coming with us as she has never been to Disney World, but always wanted to go. Some of my collegues were quite surprised about this decision, as they couldn’t imagine taking one of their in-laws with them on vacation. But I am actually really excited for her to join us on this trip. I believe this is the first vaction where my fiancé will have his mom all to himself, as he has always had to share her with his two other siblings, so it will be nice for them to spend some quality time together. Moreover, I really get along with her (she’s a lovely person) and she’s just as much into Christmas and amusement parks as I am. And bonus: it will be nice to have someone who also likes to visit every single souvenir shop hahaha ;).

So in honor of our trip ti Disney I have decided to make y motto for the upcoming week:


I’m gonna kick this week’s but!


The not so chubby girl in the mirror

chubby girl mirrorEven though I know I have lost a lot of weight, which the scale still confirms every week, I often enough do not see myself as a regular (or healthy) sized girl. When I look into the mirror I often still see the overweight, chubby girl that I have been for most of my life. Even when others tell me how much weight I have lost, I am occasionally quite blind to it.

Last week I went shopping with my lovely friend Bianca and tried on a dress which had a pencil skirt. Whilst I was unsure whether or not I should take the dress, because I was worrying if it did not make my hips look huge, if it was flattering and did not make me look bigger than I was she blurted out: Gosh Mar! You are so skinny!

And this actually came as a total surprise to me, since at that very moment I was still seeing the chubby girl in the mirror. You know, the type that shouldn’t wear pencil skirts, because they are unflattering?

I ended up buying the dress, because I decided that I liked it and that I actually did look good in it. Once the weather actually allows for me to wear it (which I hope is really soon) I will try to see if I can make a picture of it to share with you guys. (Go project confidence!).

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Apps I use to lose weight: Daily Yoga


The home screen

This is the first of a series of blog posts in which I write about apps and websites I use that (have) help(ed) me to lose weight.

The first one I wanted to write about is Daily Yoga, because I have been using it for half a year by now and am still incredibly happy with it. Please note that this post is not sponsored in any way, and really just my opinion about the app.

I have cut this review up in three parts, as I want to give you guys a general introduction on how the app works and give a bit more information about the free and premium version of the app.

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Minor victories

When I was getting on the scales this morning I was expecting a small loss. I had been exercising quite a bit this week and had been mindful of what I ate. Imagine my surprise when the scales indicated that I weighed 67,0 kg. A 0,3 kg (or 0,6 lbs) gain compared to last week!

I was trying to analyze where I had gone wrong. Maybe I didn’t watch my food as well as I thought I did? Could I be retaining water? I eventually shrugged, sat down on my couch and had my coffee. I was still not going to let it ruin my day. Better luck next week.

After browsing on my phone for a bit I decided to get up and do my Yoga. After all it is my day of, so that means approx. 30 minutes of Yoga. In turned on my Daily Yoga app (review coming soon) and started doing the exercises. Now, somewhere at the 20 minute point the app asked me to do a tree pose. Now I have been able to do a modified tree pose, which looks like this: Continue reading

2017: goals and expectations

As promised, I will be entirely dedicating this blog post to my goals and resolutions for 2017. Just to keep everything nice and tidy, I have decided to divide this post up like the one in which I reflected on 2016.


Well my first goal for this year is to loose the weight I gained during Christmas and New Years. I really decided to just let myself go, and deal with the aftermath once the holidays were over. And as today is January first I have immediately started to watch what I am eating even though my fiancé has really been tempting me with lots of yummy, not so healthy food haha.

Once I have accomplished this, I intend to maintain this weight for the rest of the year. Now, I know from previous attempts that this is going to be a bit of a challenge, but I have never been this determined to keep off weight before. So yes, I really, actually think that I have got this! 😀

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Exercise Continue reading

Weight-loss update: You win some you lose some

Well I thought it was about time for a weight-loss update… Unfortunately, it will be a bit of a walk of shame though. Gasp! I am not infallible! 😛 I am forcing myself to write it all down, so I will not be inclined to do this again. ^__^” So prepare yourself.

reality2I would love to say that I have not touched a piece of chocolate, a slice of pizza or a fry since the last update, but if I did I would be lying. Truthfully, my eating has been all over the place. As you could read in my previous post I have been battling deadlines and a throat infection… So during that week I basically ate everything sweet or savoury that I could get my hands on just to keep myself going. This included, among others, custard as it was cold and liquid (as I don’t like yogurt I didn’t really have any other options). Well it will be no surprise that as a result of eating all that crap + not moving much due to sickness, I gained weight. 1,2 kilo’s (or 2,6 lbs) to be precise ^__^”.

8832cf4367531fb945b6c68b072b9e3dThe week after wasn’t much better food wise. This was partially because the week was insanely busy, I was still recovering from a throat infection which has now turned into a sinus infection (-__- really?) and it was also hell week! All in one! Yeay! Continue reading

Weight-loss update and new sleeping schedule

Apologies in the delay in posting. I had written the majority of this post on Sunday, but could not get around to finishing it as I was simply too tired. In this post I would like to give you guys a short update on my weight-loss, as well as a longer update on my experiences with my sleep psychiatrist.

It seems like my body really likes to stick around the 67.4 kg (or 148,5 lbs). Last week I managed to get down to 67,2, but due to a not so clever (or healthy) food choice on Saturday I was back at 67,4 on Sunday. To be honest, I am actually fine with this (not with the food choice though haha). True, I would ideally like to lose another 1,4 kg (or 3 lbs), but I am not really in a rush to do so. I already like the way I look and am really satisfied with my clothing size, so it’s all good. Continue reading

Week 13: Goal met!

anime-peace-signWell I didn’t exactly crush my goal as I had intended, but I did make it! 🙂 Sunday morning I was exactly 68kg (149.9 lbs or 10.7 st). I am pretty stoked, as I have not been this weight in 10 (?!) years!

In my previous blogpost I wrote that I wasn’t entirely sure whether or not I was going to set myself another goal. In reply to my questions what other people’s thoughts were on this a number of my lovely readers (you know who you are) advised me to pick a different, non weight-loss related goal instead.

I looked at some examples of fitness goals, but am hesitant to set any of them as I am currently afraid that will be overworking my body. I am still greatly struggling with fatigue issues (which has even forced me not to do Yoga for a couple of days). As I will be taking tap-dancing lessons starting next week, I think it would be a bad idea to set another fitness goal for now.

There is, however, one goal that has been on my mind for a while. A fellow blogger, Daveywankenobie (check him out, he is a really good writer) who is also struggling to build his self-confidence, started to post selfies of himself. I really, really dislike having my picture taken so I have decided that this would be a really good way of getting used to seeing myself in pictures. So I will be setting that as my goal: take pictures and selfies and share them! This will, however, have to wait until I have my new phone (which will be soon), as the camera on my current one is pretty bad.

I have also decided that I am going to stick to this eating pattern for now, which may mean I will lose some more weight. The goal ultimate goal, after all, is a healthy lifestyle, so that is what I am going to keep working towards.


3 month’s in: Close to goal! Should I set a new one?

wpid-il_fullxfull-380860423_cr4kWell it has been three months since I have started my journey and blog.. And I am so, so, so close to the goal! This morning the goal indicated 68,2 kg (150.35 lbs)! So a 0,5 kg (1,1 lbs) loss, which means I have just -0,2 kg  (o,4 lbs) to go to the goal I set myself. I am sooo going to crush that next week! I have not been 68 kg in 10 years so I am really pleased with myself on this point.

So what I am going to do once I have reached the goal? To be honest, I have been considering continuing for a bit more. Continue reading

Week 11: To sleep perchance to dream

Dear readers,

Apologies in being a little late with this blogpost, but last week was a rather busy week.

Last week on Tuesday I stayed at the hospital for one night so they could research my sleeping habits. If I remember correctly, I had about 25 electrodes on my head alone to track my brain activity. They also tracked my breathing through some kind of tubes which were applied underneath my nose (and which annoyed the living hell out of me). And applied some more electrodes to my arms and legs to track my body movement during sleep.

The doctor who was in charge of covering me with adhesive clay, glue,  plasters and electrodes informed me that I was the only one who was getting the full treatment that night. Apparently, my doctor really wanted to measure anything and everything that happened during my sleep, so she just gave the order to stick everything on that could be stuck on. It took the doctor who assisted me that evening about an hour to stick everything on. And you know what? I was 100% ok with that! That meant that there was a bigger chance of them finding anything. And was also an indication that I was actually being taken seriously. Whoot!  Continue reading